03 May 2002 An Apology To Belfast Motorists First of all I would like to offer a sincere apology to anyone who was driving around Belfast city centre this afternoon. Yes, I was the stupid bloody woman who didn't have the remotest idea of where the hell she was going or what lane to be in. I'm so, so sorry. I don't drive into Belfast that often - it's big and fast and I don't know one end of it from the other. At work I'll usually pass the Belfast fares on to someone else unless it's to or from the bus station/train station/airport/hospital/one of several popular nightspots. If I had to drive into Belfast I certainly wouldn't choose to do so on a busy Friday afternoon. Well, not normally, except around lunchtime today I suddenly remembered my taxi insurance expires on Sunday at noon. Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit, was the response. You see I've changed insurance companies this year. I loved the company I've been with but they make you pay the policy off over six months. This year I'm spending - wait for this - one thousand and seven hundred pounds to keep that damned cab on the road. I'd no choice but to switch to a company which would give me nine months to pay the damned thing. One thousand and seven hundred pounds. Yes folks that's the real reason taxi fares are so damned expensive and that only covers injury to my passengers or other road users. If anything happens whilst I'm driving I'm fucked, but my passenger can sue me for up to a million quid. Charming. So, anyway, there was a mad scramble around the house to gather up all the relevant documents and a mad dash to Belfast to make sure I was still on the road after the weekend. I loathe the damned job with a passion but I've just signed myself up for it for another year whether it's only part-time or not. Oh, and just in case you think I'm paying hellish insurance rates, a first time cabbie will be paying just over three thousand pounds this year to get on the road in Northern Ireland.
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