Monday, Dec. 31, 2001 The Nature Of Truth - Part Two If you haven't read it before, you may want to check out this entry. We're all liars - each and every one of us. I defy anyone to say to me they've never told a lie in their life. Where the danger lies is when you encounter people who are unable to distinguish the truth from the fiction of lies they have woven. The people who genuinely believe the lies they are telling - and it's a lot more common than you may think. I can honestly say that the scariest thing I've ever encountered in my entire life is a person who could look me in the eye and repeat something we both knew wasn't true even though there was no-one else there. Is it a type of insanity? I don't know if there's a technical term for it, but I do know that if it is madness then there's a hell of a lot of crazy people out there. I had a friend who was a compulsive liar. Nice enough bloke, but very much a Walter Mitty character who'd tell the most outrageous stories. Fair enough when he was a kid - lots of kids make stuff up, but he carried it on until adulthood. Now, there is a technical term for that sort of mental disorder - it's called mythomania and sadly, he was a classic case. What's even sadder is that it's not the only case I've encountered. The one thing all these people have in common is that they are clearly dissatisfied with their lives. For some reason or other they don't think their lives are 'good enough' so they need to embroider the truth with fantastic facts. Some like to brag about wonderful things they have done, what possessions they have or even about their lovers while some want to elicit sympathy. A sad tale elicits sympathy but this dies down after a while so more tales of woe have to be invented, each one becoming more and more outrageous as the listeners become desensitised. Or else there's the urge to be part of the herd, telling stories to fit in with the crowd. I do know one true story (although for obvious reasons I can't go into details) where an innocent father was accused of child abuse simply because the mother was taking her daughter along to group therapy sessions. Every other child attending had been sexually abused and the girl wanted to be part of the group so much she confessed that her father had been molesting her. The father was cleared and still has a very good, and healthy relationship with is daughter - but a lot of harm could have been done. On a personal note, you probably already know about the little internet war I was involved in this year? One of the silliest things which struck me about it was that several people who weren't directly involved suddenly started posting messages and diary entries all over the place accusing me of harrassing them. Messageboards were closed, guestbooks were taken down and statments made that my email address had been blocked. The problem was these statements were being made by people I'd said nothing to! They were so desperate to feel part of something - even a stupid spat - that they went to these extreme lengths. I was in a no-win situation. If I replied to the accusations I'd have been accused of keeping the trouble going, when I didn't respond it left people who didn't know me with the impression that I was pestering these poor people out of all proportion. There's nothing you can do if you encounter either an individual or a group which acts in this manner. If I had any advice to give if you encounter a chronic liar or a mythomaniac it would be to say nothing - don't call them on the lies you've spotted and simply begin to distance yourself from them. Trying to make them face reality is pointless since they are choosing not to live in the real world - you're best to step away and leave them to it.
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